Click to
order
Click to
order
 
A Good Steward
Publishing
|
| |
Money
Stress Relief
by Kathy Miller
"It is hard to think.
My heart is racing in my chest and I feel like my knees might give out at any
moment. My boss just finished telling me how important this report is to his
presentation tomorrow and I know the outcome will affect our quarterly bonuses.
I need that bonus. If my rent is late again the landlord will start the
eviction process and there's no place else for us to go. I have to finish the
report, but I can't concentrate."
Natalie is one of hundreds of
thousands of employed Americans who bring money stress to work with them on a
daily basis. The worried workers usually carry their financial burdens in
silence because they feel ashamed. Holding those intense feelings in is a
recipe for stress and ill-health, not to mention loss of
productivity.
What happens to people when they are stressed out about
money?
It is not really possible for a person to be suffering and
struggling in one area of their life without experiencing a spillover effect on
the rest of it. Even short term financial struggle can cause health and/or
relationship problems, zapping a person's energy, altering their behavior, and
making them feel inadequate.
Bonnie is struggling with raising her
children as a single parent. "Everything is okay as long as nobody gets
sick, nothing breaks down, and I can pick up extra shifts at my second job. The
balance is like walking a tightrope, week after week, month after month. For a
while I was inspired to do the best I could to get promoted to a higher paying
position, but I probably acted more aggressively than was appropriate. I felt I
was at a disadvantage since I could not socialize after work like everyone else
in the office. Stepping on peoples' toes to get ahead is not my style, but I
found myself doing it anyway. Then I felt guilty. When Gloria got the promotion
I wanted to scream. She was annoyingly cheerful. I wanted to be happy for her,
but my son needs braces and I cannot afford them right now. I felt desperate
and angry, but I just smiled and congratulated her. Later I fought the urge to
search for another job on the internet.
Although neither of them
would feel comfortable discussing their financial problems with him, both
Natalie and Bonnie work for a man named John who would understand how they feel
because he is in a precarious financial situation even though his income far
exceeds theirs. "My wife recently got laid off from her corporate job. Our
kids attend an expensive private school which we may not be able to afford next
year. Many of our family's social connections will be lost if the kids have to
transfer to public school. Last night our discussion about what to do turned
into an argument, so no decisions were made. Today I am preoccupied and a
little jittery."
Money stress can affect anyone regardless of age,
intelligence or income. Following are tips for dealing with money
stress:
Take deep breaths.
When we worry we tend to
breathe shallowly. With less oxygen our thinking becomes less clear. Breathing
deeply will help dissipate the mental fog.
Twenty Connected Breaths
Exercise: Take four quick, short deep breaths then one long deep breath
without pausing in between breaths. Repeat 4 cycles.
Face your
fears.
Fear is the most common emotion associated with money stress.
Face the fear by pondering the question, "What is the worst thing that could
happen?" Most money stress has nothing to do with a life or death situation,
but until we think about it the fear feels that intense. It is difficult, if
not impossible, to create solutions under that kind of
pressure.
Replace your fears.
Do not linger with the worst
that could happen any longer than necessary. Next think about the best thing
that could happen. How could your problems be solved in a positive, practical
way? Stretch beyond sarcasm to real possibilities, even ones that seem a little
far-fetched. Remember a time when you were just as worried and things worked
out somehow. Imagine yourself feeling relieved and free with your money
problems behind you. Hang on to that vision.
Clear your
slate.
Instinct may tell you to run harder and faster to make more
money, however you cannot outrun stress. Clutter leads to chaos, so do
everything you can to clear your space. Balance your checkbook, file your
papers, recycle your junk mail, and tie up any loose ends. An organized space
creates clarity. That frantic, racing feeling will subside and be replaced with
a sense of calm when your affairs are in order. When you start with a clean
slate your creativity flows freely.
Search for
solutions.
Read How to Solve Your Money Problems for details about
applying tried and true problem-solving methods to your finances. When seeking
a solution, look to resolve the causes of your stress rather than the effects.
For instance while going on a spending spree might feel good for a little
while, it will not make things better in the long run.
Bring in
reinforcements.
Financial success has more to do with life skills and
lifestyle decisions than with investment strategies. Practicing stress
management techniques like deep breathing will lead to improved decision
making. You can also take advantage of employer sponsored financial education
seminars, read books about finances, or hire a coach to teach you the basics of
money management.
For more information about dealing with money
stress, contact Kathy
Miller.
Copyright ©2004 Kathy Miller. All rights
reserved.
Return to Articles &
Quizzes
|
|
|
|
|
An Alternative
to Budgeting!
|
